Question:
Do you ever wonder if you feel more than everyone else?“Think before you blog.”
This is good advice. I’ll stop running my nerdy mouth.
I think my generation puts too much emphasis on super music compatibility in relationships. I don’t want someone who thinks exactly the same as me on food, or politics, or fashion, so why would I want someone to be the same as me on music? It’s our differences that force us to grow and to not be stagnant people. I always want to grow as a person: singularly and in relationships. I want my music horizons to be broadened, my food tastes to grow, my political views to be challenged, and to have fun with fashion forever. People are much more than what is on their ipod. They are more than the clothes they wear. They are more than democrat/republican. I want to surround myself with people who are deeper than their music and I want to be a person who is worth more then the music I listen to.
I made this.
How do people turn into the people they judged and hated so easily? Why do people ignore and go against everything they believe in, in order to be “loved?” I’ve done it. You’ve done it.
When you’re in it, it seems ok, but everyone on the outside sees how you’re selling yourself short and you look like a fool. Jane Austen said “we’re all fools in love.”
I think that if you’ve changed your core self to become someone you’re not, your core self is not what is loved, and that’s not real love at all. So instead of being a fool in love, you’ve become a fool for love.
So, I’m at Coffeehouse Northwest, trying out what I think will be my new coffee shop to sit in and people watch, and we all just found out that Michael Jackson died. It’s kinda a weird feeling, which I’m surprised about. Oddly sad. They’re playing MJ now. Billy Jean. The girl working just said she feels like she should say a prayer for MJ. They’re going to play MJ all day. This is what happened today at my new observation point.
Thriller’s playing now.
…but funny. Thanks to fanny for posting this.
Actually, I’ve had a few conversations about cannibalism. No one really seems to want to discuss it in depth though: the moral decision, the repercussions, who to eat, when to eat, etc.
Last week I randomly wound up at a restaurant that I first went to a year ago. I remembered the circumstances I was in and how I hoped things turn out. Well here I am a year later and not one thing I wished a year ago happened. I am not anywhere near where I wanted to be a year ago and I couldn’t be happier about it. I guess I’m a pretty small thinker, so thank God He has bigger plans for my life than I do.
I’ve been writing this bloggy for a year now. For some reason I get a bit of odd joy out of writing it. This past year has been really intense for me. A lot of it has been really bad but a lot of it has been really good. Right now most everything is great, which is good for you, dear reader.
Speaking of, thanks to all you who follow this thing. I know I write a ton and that when some of you read it it sounds like blah blah blah. I’ll try to keep it short and sweet but you know me, I’m not much of a short and sweet kinda person in the thinking department. Thanks to all who’ve read along the roller coaster with me.
Well, I’m off to adventure on this beautiful day!
Unsolicited advice sometimes does more harm then good. I’ve been giving this a lot of thought lately, drawing from personal experience and from watching others, and this is the conclusion I’ve come to. Offering advice as an act of showing concern can be extremely effective, if asked for. It exercises vulnerability, trust, and respect by both parties. On the other hand, offering advice to someone who hasn’t asked for it can do a lot of damage. To the subject the advice is hurled at, the advisor seems judgmental and hyper-critical.
For lame example: Saying “You look fat in those pants,” will not be received well unless someone asks you, “Do I look fat in these pants?” first.
I also think the forum in which advice is given can have a huge effect on the message. If advice is given in private, or within a small group of close people, the message can be very affective. But if advice is given publicly, it can bring shame or embarrassment, and most always puts the receiver on the defensive.
Of course this is a generalized observation. Sometimes you need to get in your friends face and tell them something they don’t want to hear. Sometimes interventions are necessary but these are usually extreme, last resort cases.
I think I’ve got a pretty good handle on this topic because I have a history of speaking my mind inappropriately. I’ve learned that the way you deliver the message makes all the difference.
Back to the pants example: If you tell someone they look fat in their pants, they’re going to think you’re a jerk, even if they do look fat in those pants. If they ask you if they look fat in their pants and you stand up on a chair and announce to the store that, indeed, they look fat in their pants, they will hate you. If someone asks you if they look fat in their pants and you look at them and say, you look fat in those pants, they’ll feel bad, take them off, then be glad you saved them from those pants. You said the same thing every time. Your message was damaging twice and only effective once.
Bottom line is this: I’m tired of people airing dirty laundry publicly and calling it concern or advice. The bad taste you leave in my mouth by the unwise way you’re going about trying to better people has neutered your point completely.
For those of you who missed it:
